assignment: write a scathing review of an album you love
Out of the Vein
Third Eye Blind
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When I bought Out of the Vein, Third Eye Blind’s latest contribution to the not-quite-pop-but-not-quite-rock music scene, all the store had left was the edited version.
It’s too bad producers lacked the foresight to go ahead and edit out the album altogether.
While the album has a few decent songs – the obscurely sentimental “Crystal Baller” is catchy, if you listen a few times, and the mellow “When I See You” tends to please teen radio fans – it’s pretty worthless on the whole.
In their latest, the band have tried to build a record off clichéd lyrics that would make even Fastball cringe, such as “You skid into my darkness, forming sex and death, heartbreak and strife,” a few opening acoustics that, like a commercial from hell, get stuck in your head, and the ultra-novel concept of a “hidden track,” with – aw, isn’t that cute? – TEB frontman Stephan Jenkins’ girlfriend Vanessa Carlton contributing some minor musicianship as well.
That’s not to say that there aren’t a few good lyrical moments. In “Crystal Baller,” Jenkins sings – convincingly, if not creatively – of the painful uncertainties in a relationship, packing multiple allusions into singular lines: “I keep on going from week to weakness, way out in a line.” And the jumps between various dynamics and tempos keep the song moving. You also might find yourself surrendering to the bubblegum “Can’t Get Away from You,” albeit against your will: the bouncy triplets and studio-effect echoing somehow appeal to one’s seventh-grade pop affinity while inexplicably managing to suggest legitimacy.
But despite – very – few inspired bars, Out of the Vein falls pathetically short of any sort of true musicianship, with nearly every song following the same formula of guitar-and-percussion intro, mournful commentary, and more guitar and percussion climaxing in a bridge in minor key, then coming back to repeat it over before fading out, giving a new significance to "chop a new line like a coda with a curse." It works one or two times, but not thirteen. And after the first few songs, Jenkins’ voice starts to grate against the ears, as does the incessant whining about how many relationships have dramatically, poetically failed (which is what most songs cover. Repeatedly). The lyrics, if you don’t let yourself be seduced by the sometimes-raw emotion, have a triteness factor reminiscent of Tuesdays with Morrie: “Everyone is so self-righteous /Get up everyone/ We’re on our own now,” and “I never believed that things they happen for a reason and/They never go as planned,” with a conspicuous number of “Oh yeahhhhhhhh”s that go all the way up the scale, and then back, again, twice, interspersed as well.
Out of the Vein was a good try, of course. If a part of you still longs for the easy-listening crooning of the late nineties, you'll like the emotion here, and naturally this one'll please TEB fans who enjoyed eerily similar fare on the past two albums, but unless you’re a die-hard for Stephan Jenkins or looking for ways to poeticize your recent breakup, skip both the versions of this one.
Third Eye Blind
---
When I bought Out of the Vein, Third Eye Blind’s latest contribution to the not-quite-pop-but-not-quite-rock music scene, all the store had left was the edited version.
It’s too bad producers lacked the foresight to go ahead and edit out the album altogether.
While the album has a few decent songs – the obscurely sentimental “Crystal Baller” is catchy, if you listen a few times, and the mellow “When I See You” tends to please teen radio fans – it’s pretty worthless on the whole.
In their latest, the band have tried to build a record off clichéd lyrics that would make even Fastball cringe, such as “You skid into my darkness, forming sex and death, heartbreak and strife,” a few opening acoustics that, like a commercial from hell, get stuck in your head, and the ultra-novel concept of a “hidden track,” with – aw, isn’t that cute? – TEB frontman Stephan Jenkins’ girlfriend Vanessa Carlton contributing some minor musicianship as well.
That’s not to say that there aren’t a few good lyrical moments. In “Crystal Baller,” Jenkins sings – convincingly, if not creatively – of the painful uncertainties in a relationship, packing multiple allusions into singular lines: “I keep on going from week to weakness, way out in a line.” And the jumps between various dynamics and tempos keep the song moving. You also might find yourself surrendering to the bubblegum “Can’t Get Away from You,” albeit against your will: the bouncy triplets and studio-effect echoing somehow appeal to one’s seventh-grade pop affinity while inexplicably managing to suggest legitimacy.
But despite – very – few inspired bars, Out of the Vein falls pathetically short of any sort of true musicianship, with nearly every song following the same formula of guitar-and-percussion intro, mournful commentary, and more guitar and percussion climaxing in a bridge in minor key, then coming back to repeat it over before fading out, giving a new significance to "chop a new line like a coda with a curse." It works one or two times, but not thirteen. And after the first few songs, Jenkins’ voice starts to grate against the ears, as does the incessant whining about how many relationships have dramatically, poetically failed (which is what most songs cover. Repeatedly). The lyrics, if you don’t let yourself be seduced by the sometimes-raw emotion, have a triteness factor reminiscent of Tuesdays with Morrie: “Everyone is so self-righteous /Get up everyone/ We’re on our own now,” and “I never believed that things they happen for a reason and/They never go as planned,” with a conspicuous number of “Oh yeahhhhhhhh”s that go all the way up the scale, and then back, again, twice, interspersed as well.
Out of the Vein was a good try, of course. If a part of you still longs for the easy-listening crooning of the late nineties, you'll like the emotion here, and naturally this one'll please TEB fans who enjoyed eerily similar fare on the past two albums, but unless you’re a die-hard for Stephan Jenkins or looking for ways to poeticize your recent breakup, skip both the versions of this one.
posted by Kelly at
2:54 PM
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2 comments
